Coconut Cruncher

Dear Sir/Madam, I beg you to spare 5 minutes from your busy schedule to read this, the plea of a bereaved but proud father. My son, Lt. Saurabh Kalia of the 4 JAT Regiment of the Indian Army laid down his life at the young age of 22 for the nation while guarding the frontiers at Kargil. We, his parents, the Indian Army and indeed, the nation itself, lost a dedicated, honest and brave son. He was the first officer to detect and inform his superiors about the Pakistani intrusion. Pakistan captured him and his patrol party of 5 brave men alive on May 15, 1999 from the Indian side of the LOC. They were kept in captivity for 3 weeks and subjected to unprecedented and brutal torture, evident from their bodies, which were handed over by the Pakistan Army on June 9, 1999. While trying to extract information, the Pakistanis had indulged in dastardly acts with these Indian officers - inflicting cigarette burns on their bodies, piercing their ears with hot rods, puncturing and gouging out th...

ji , aaiye aaiye. Kaun sa sabun lena pasand karengi. Ye dekhiye ye.. (Someother soap which is not nirma) Deepika(Customer):Nahi Nahi ye nahi woh(pointing at nirma). Shopkeeper:Par aap to woh, purana wala sabun....(stammering) Deepika(Customer):Leti thi, par wahi safedi mujhe kam damo mein mile to koi woh kyun le, ye(nirma) na le! Shopkeeper:Man gaye!! Deepika(Customer):Kise? Shopkeeper:Aapki par ki nazar aur nirma super dono ko !!! Now the song starts... ;-) WASHING POWDER NIRMA WASHING POWDER NIRMA DUDH SE SAFEDI NIRMA SE AAYE RANGEEN KAPDA BHI KHIL KHIL JAYE SABKI PASAND NIRMA WASHING POWDER NIRMA NIRMA....... LOGO KO KUCH BHI BHEJO PADHNE LAG JATE HAIN........ kya yaar kab sudhroge? :D

Hi, Be careful when you SMS... A True Story: This lady has changed her habit on the hand phone after her handbag was stolen. Her handbag which contained her mobile, credit card, purse etc. was stolen. Twenty minutes later when she called her hubby, telling him what had happened, her hubby says 'I've just received your SMS asking about our Pin number and I've replied a little while ago.' When they rushed down to the bank, the bank staff told them all the money was already withdrawn. The pickpocket had actually used the stolen hand phone to sms 'hubby' in the contact list and got hold of the pin number. Within 20 minutes he had withdrawn all the money from the bank account. Moral of the lesson: Do not disclose the relationship between you and the person in your contact list. Avoid using names like Home, Honey, Hubby, Sweetheart, Dad, Mum etc...... and very importantly, when sensitive info is being asked thru SMS, CONFIRM by calling back. PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO YOU...

The Driver's Licence A mother is driving a little girl to her friend's house for a play date. "Mommy," the little girl asks, "how old are you?" "Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age," the mother replied. "It's not polite." "OK", the little girl says, "How much do! you weigh?" "Now really," the mother says, "those are personal questions and are really none of your business." Undaunted, the little girl asks, "Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?" "That is enough questions, young lady, honestly!" The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends begin to play. "My Mom won't tell me anything about her," the little girl says to her friend. "Well," says the friend, "all you need to do is look at her drivers license. It is like a report card, it has everything on it." Later that night the little girl says to her mother, "I kn...

A man called home to his wife and said, "Honey I have been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my boss and several of his friends. We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting, so could you please pack enough clothes for a week and set out my rod and fishing box? We're leaving from the office so I'll just swing by the house to pick my things up…oh, and please pack my new blue silk pyjamas." His wife thought this last bit sounded a bit fishy but being the good wife she was, did exactly as he asked. Her husband came by that afternoon and picked up his things, kissed her goodbye and left. The following weekend he came home a little tired but otherwise looking good. His wife welcomed him home and asked if he had caught many fish? He said, "Oh yes! Lots of salmon, some bluegill and a few swordfish. It's quite amazing how rich the rivers are up there. But why didn't you pack my new blue silk pyjam...

Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here." The astonished Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your PearlHarbour, it was the Japanese". "Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same," replied Spielberg. In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says, "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship." Shocked, Spielberg replies, "It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me." The Chinese replies, "Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, Von Berg you're all the same."

This info. is sure to help PC users very much. During a recent visit to an optician, one of my friends was told of an exercise for the eyes by a specialist doctor that he termed as 20-20-20 ." It is apt for all of us, who spend long hours at our desks, looking at the computer screen. I Thought I'd share it with you. Step I :- After every 20 minutes of looking into the computer screen, turn your head and try to look at any object placed at least 20 feet away. This changes the focal length of your eyes, a must-do for the tired eyes. Step II :- Try and blink your eyes for 20 times in succession, to moisten them. Step III :- Time permitting of course, one should walk 20 paces after every 20 minutes of sitting in one particular posture. Helps blood circulation for the entire body. Circulate among your friends if you care for them and their eyes. They say that your eyes are a mirror of your soul, so do take care of them, they are priceless... Otherwise our eye wou...

A big hulking hooligan walks into a bar, slams his fist down, and yells "Give me a Budweiser, or...!" Scared, the bartender serves the man his Budweiser. This happens everyday for a week straight, and the bartender turns into a nervous wreck. He asks his wife for advice, and she tells him he should stand up for himself. Easier said than done, he thinks, but he decides to try it. The next day, the hooligan returns. "Give me a Budweiser, or...!" "O-o-o-o-r-r-r... w-w-what?" stammers the bartender. "A small Coke."

Would you just look at the expression on the "other" little girl's face! That is so adorable!!!

Dear Friends, As you struggle through the various pages and sections of the Income Tax returns, here's a truly SARAL form that the FinMin has devised which makes it all so simple.... take advantage of this.