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(J) Stupid Questions!

Stupid Questions with Witty answers!!

1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends...

SQ: Hey, what are you doing here?
WA: Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
SQ: Sorry, did that hurt?
WA: No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.....why don't you try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask...
SQ: Why, why him, of all people.
WA: Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
SQ: Is ! the "Butter Paneer Masala" dish good??
WA: No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occassionaly also spit in it.

5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years...
SQ: Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
WA: Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.

6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask...
SQ: Is the guy you're marrying good?
WA: No,he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.

7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call...
SQ: Sorry. were you sleeping?
WA: No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping....you dumb witted moron.

8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair...
SQ: Hey have you had a haircut?
WA: No, its autumn and I'm shedding......

9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth...
SQ: Tell me if it hurts?
WA: No it wont. It will just bleed.

10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks...
SQ: Oh, so you smoke.
WA: Gosh, it's a miracle .......it was a piece of chalk and now it's in flames!!!

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