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Showing posts from December, 2007

Strokes - save a life

Please do your part and send it on, I did mine. It may just be one of US it saves. STROKE: Remember The 1st Three Steps STROKE IDENTIFICATION: During a party, a friend stumbled and took a little fall - she assured everyone that she was fine (they offered to call paramedics) and just tripped over a brick because of her new shoes. They got her cleaned up and got her a new plate of food - while she appeared a bit shaken up, Ingrid went about enjoying herself the rest of the evening. Ingrid's husband called later telling everyone that his wife had been taken to the hospital - (at 6:00pm, Ingrid passed away.) She had suffered a stroke at the party. Had they known how to identify the signs of a stroke, perhaps Ingrid would be with us today. Some ?don't die. They end up in a helpless, hopeless condition instead. It only takes a minute to read this... A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke...totally. He sa

(J) 5 toughest questions that men have to answer

The five toughest questions men have to answer 1.What are you thinking? 2.Do you love me? 3.Do I look fat? 4.Do you think she is prettier than me? 5.What would you do if I died? What makes these questions so bad is that every one is guaranteed to explode into major argument and/or divorce if the man doesn't answer properly. For example: 1) What are you thinking? The proper answer to this question, of course, is, "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, caring, thoughtful, intelligent, beautiful woman you are and what a lucky guy I am to have met you." Obviously, this statement bears no resemblance whatsoever to what the guy was really thinking at the time, which was most likely one of five things: a)Baseball b)Football c)How fat you are d)How much prettier she is than you e)How he would spend the insurance money if you died (The best answer to

Pork Chops?

PORK CHOPS? In a California zoo, a tiger gave birth to a rare set of triplets. Unfortunately, due to complications during pregnancy, the cubs were born prematurely and, due to their tiny size, they died shortly after birth. The mother tiger after recovering from the delivery, started to decline in health, although she was fine, physically. The veterinarians felt that the loss of her litter had caused the tigress to fall into a depression. They decided that if the she could get surrogate cubs, perhaps she would improve. After checking with many other zo os across the country, they found that there were no tiger cubs of the right age to introduce to the mourning mother. The veterinarians decided to try something that had never been tried in a zoo environment. Sometimes a mother of one species does take care of a different species. The only orphans that could be found quickly, were a litter of weanling pigs. The zoo keepers and vets wrapped the piglets in false tiger skin and placed t

(J) Cool 'elderly' jokes!! LOL! read these!!

A man was telling his neighbor, 'I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect.' 'Really,' answered the neighbor . 'What kind is it?' 'Twelve thirty.' Three old guys are out walking. First one says, 'Windy, isn't it?' Second one says, 'No, it's Thursday!' Third one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer.' Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. 'Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?' he asks. 'Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?' 'Sure.' 'Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' she asks. 'No, I can remember it.' 'Well, I'd like

(J) The Blonde

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, 'Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started.' Her boyfriend asks, 'What is it supposed to be when it's finished?' The blonde says, 'According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster.' Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, 'First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.' He takes her hand and says, 'Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then ..' he said with a deep sigh, 'Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box.'