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Showing posts from July, 2008

Attention

If you have a function/party at your home and if there is excess food available at the end, don't hesitate to call 1098 (only in India) - child helpline. They will come and collect the food. Please circulate this message which can help feed many children. PLEASE, DON'T BREAK THIS CHAIN, "Helping hands are better than Praying Lips"

Fast Food Renaissance‏

After a short visit to the united States, Michelangelo's David returns to Italy.. Proud sponsors:

Night Classes

At a building site, two blue collar workers, Jack and Ray were chatting. Jack: Ray, I've been attending night classes for five months now and I have an exam next week. Ray: Oh…well, how's that going for you? Jack: Great! I'm learning all this cool stuff! For example, do you know who Graham Bell is? Ray: No. Jack: He invented the telephone in 1876. If you took night classes you'd know that. Ray: Oh…that's pretty cool I guess. The next day, Jack hailed Ray at the site again. Jack: Hey Ray, do you know who Alexander Dumas is? Ray: No. Jack: He's the author of 'The Three Musketeers'. You know, if you took night classes like me, you'd know that. Ray frowned in annoyance but said nothing. The next day, Jack came up to Ray again. Jack: Hey Ray! Do you know who Jean Jacques Rousseau is? Ray: No! Jack: He's the author of 'Confessions'. If you took those night classes, you'd know that. Ray had had enough. He straightened up and turned to Jack.

Communication Gap

A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?" She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by." "No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?" "It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," she responded. "I mean," he continued, "What are your relations like?" "I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband's parents." He said, "Do you have a real grudge?" "No," she replied, "We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one." "Please," he tried again, "is there any infidelity in your marriage?" "Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes." "Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?

Priest VS Pilot

A priest dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy dressed in goggles, a loud t-shirt, mud- spattered jeans and a daring attitude. Saint Peter addresses the cool guy, 'Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you into the Kingdom of Heaven? ' The guy replies, 'I'm Desai, retired Indian Airlines Pilot from New Delhi'. Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the pilot, 'Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom.' The pilot enters heaven with his robe and staff. Next, it's the priest's turn. He stands erect and booms out, 'I am Father Bob, pastor of Saint Mary's in Pasadena, California, for the last 43 years.' Saint Peter consults his list. He says to the priest, ' OK, take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom.' 'Just a minute,' says the good father. 'That man was a pilot and he gets a silken robe and golden staff, and I get

Pfizer Announcement

Pfizer Announcement Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names 'cocktails' and 'highballs'. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of 'Mount 'n Do'. There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

How To Save a Wet Phone

1. Get it out of the water as soon as possible. The plastic covers on cell phones are fairly tight, but water can enter the phone in a short period of time, perhaps only 20 seconds or less. So grab your phone quickly! If you can't get to it in time, your best bet is to remove the battery while it is still under water. Water helps dissipate heat from shorts that can damage the phone, so most damage occurs when the inside of the phone is merely wet and there is a power source. 2. Remove the battery. This is one of the most important steps. Don't take time to think about it; electricity and water do not mix. Cutting power to your phone is a crucial first step in saving it. Many circuits inside the phone will survive immersion in water provided they are not attached to a power source when wet. 3. If you have a GSM carrier, remove your SIM card. Some or all of your valuable contacts (along with other data) could be stored on your SIM. To some people this could be more wor

Three mistakes of - A Roadtrip?

We saw the signboard, and went straight ahead...The turn would go back to Porvorim, my place. We were in Calangute now, and skipped the correct turn accidentally.. And there there was a junction, a fork. The left road went to the highway to Porvorim.. Course, Ap and I couldn't go.. We didn't carry a helmet, and the cops would fine us. Supri could on her bike, she had one.. But she was coming along our way. And Pris and Aakash, riding at 5 km/hr lagged somewhere far behind. ""WHAT??!! You guys are still there ??" screamed Supri. We had gone for a short roadtrip from Betim to Aguada Fort, just coz Ap had returned to visit Goa from Pune. He was homesick, and we all wanted to go somewhere further than silly-ol' Panaji. As we stopped near the signboard, we called them asking where they'd reached. So here we were, making the first mistake. We turned right. It wasn't a wrong decision - just that it would go to Betim and you wouldn't need a helmet that wa